-Akashi-kun- 「赤司くん」
by stripeapple
Summary: I would never have been so regretful for stepping into our usual ramen shop, if I hadn't had to go through this certain pressuring, painful, strange event. (AkaKuro; 10,562 words)


**-Akashi-kun- ****「赤司くん」**

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A Kuroko no Basket, Akashi x Kuroko Fanfiction by stripeapple.

Massive drama inspired to commemorate the loss of my dearest Akashi badge. *laughs*

**Genre: Drama, Romance  
Word Count: 10,562 (story only)**

**!Before you read:** I'm not a native English speaker, therefore errors are to be expected;; Pardon for OOCness.

Due to the massive length of the story, I have divided the story in little parts, marked by roman numerals.

**!Disclaimer: Kuroko no Basket ; The Basketball Which Kuroko Plays** belongs to **Fujimaki Tadatoshi**. I do NOT own any character featured in this story.

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**-I-**

I remember, I was getting off the bus as soon as Kagami-kun placed his palm on my light blue hair, and as I marched along the roads with fellow Seirin Basketball Club teammates, I saw the small ramen shop we would occasionally drop by after practice matches at other schools around Seirin.

"You didn't even stir, Kuroko. Were you really that tired?"

I rubbed my drowsy eyelids as soon as I heard Kagami-kun's comment. Little tears came out as I rubbed a tad harder, followed by a quite large yawn.

"... I suppose I was."

I didn't look into him at all, but I noticed a slight laughter in my ears.

"Make sure you eat up a lot, then. I won't take your share."

"If Kagami-kun wants to, though, feel free to do so."

Turning my face, my blurry eyes could tell that he was smiling at me, and his hand patting on my head and ruffled my hair gently. The warmth had somehow kept me in a drowsy state, and I felt like taking another round of sleep. But on the other side, Kagami-kun's strong voice had kept me awake.

"No way, man! You've got to eat lots today-before you start getting malnutrition and start hallucinating." said he, as we started taking a step inside the ramen shop.

"Yeah, Kuroko. After all, we did great today-we triumphed well. I'm sure having some extra share is plausible." Kiyoshi-san pinched a bit of my cheek, then started taking our usual seats-the left corner near the windows.

I and Kagami-kun too, took our seats and ordered our usual menus. It seems that everyone was too tired to peek at the menu and ended up ordering something out of their usual menus.

But the aura wasn't any tedious. On the contrary, everyone seemed much more relaxed than usual-despite yawns visible from person to person and some still rubbing their blurry eyes including myself-and it looked as if we were ready to go for another match after that ramen lunch.

"Kuroko, you're awfully yawning a lot more than usual..." It was the coach, and soon as the comment was given, I realized that I had been yawning too much that my dreary eyes had turned as wet as one who teared up after a dramatic reality show.

"Go wash your face, will you?"

To the coach's words, I simply rose off my seat and excused myself to the toilet-only about fifteen to twenty steps away my chair. It was located at the very back of the restaurant, a door separating between the restaurant and the toilet.

As I turned the door handle, I saw the clock on the wall straight from the door. It was twelve past twenty in the afternoon, and I wonder why was I feeling abnormally sleepy. Being tired didn't fit the condition, since I wasn't out on the court that much, compared to Kagami-kun who played a whole game.

Staring into my own deadpanned eyes in the mirror, blurry images turned gradually clearer-I washed and dried my own face a few times, hoping that I would no longer feel sleepy. In the silent toilet, I hit my own cheeks and finally regained my usual stamina.

My hands were rubbing one another in the sink, when the tap suddenly closed on its own. There was then certainly a massive earthquake-like tremble to the whole room, or that my balance was only a tad shaken.

Still having some soap foam left on my thumb, I attempted on turning the tap to the other way, but water didn't come out flowing at all. And I tried fixing it by some possible methods; with no luck, I surrendered. The fan as well, stopped working. The whole room suddenly turned silent; my footsteps being the only audible sound. I assumed the earlier grumble had caused a technical error, and I intended to go out and inform of the matter to Owner-san or any staff in the shop.

Tissues became my last resort. I wiped my hands thoroughly despite the still sticky foam on my thumb, then proceeded to go out of the toilet.

But when I opened the door to the restaurant, I was wondering whether my ears were rather deaf, since, the restaurant had the same silence as the toilet. There would usually be some clatter of chopsticks and spoons, or at least chatter of people in their diner, but there were none.

A rather heavy pressure came upon my body as I started stepping more to the restaurant.

Soon I realized that no one was there-not even anyone on the cashier. There were bowls of ramen, tableware messed on the table and ice was still chilling inside glasses of tea, but I felt the fan not circulating the air, the window reflecting the sun but not letting the outside traffic noises in, and the clock wasn't ticking.

A heavy feeling made my heart ache. It wasn't any feeling of glum, nor it was any joy. I wasn't sure of what happened, but I wasn't scared for some reason.

I walked a few steps more through the ramen shop in cautiousness.

"Kagami-kun?"

I traced my finger along the chairs I passed by.

"Riko-san?"

"Owner-san?"

The deafening silence let my call sounding clear in the room-there were no responses; not even signs of life.

I had to furrow my eyebrows and halt my steps then, to think for a while. I wondered if it was a prank from my teammates, but it would be too much, to leave the shop empty. Owner-san would at least be present, and the other customers as well.

Confused and curious, I proceeded to walk to the door to outside and pushed the door handle.

But it was locked.

.

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**-II-**

My eyes went blank for a while, as I completely had lost idea for what was happening. My hand tried to rattle on the door handle more, but not even a little did it budge.

Then suddenly, out of nowhere, I heard a sound of stirring spoon; a knock of spoon on a glass.

I turned my back against the door to where the sound came from, and had my eyes widened in instant for seeing that someone was actually there. Moreover, the person before my eyes was someone I recognize very well; someone I didn't expect to show up at such situation and such place, someone who looks like no other. So I hesitated nothing to call out his name in an overly trembling voice,

"Akashi-kun..."

Former captain of my basketball team when I was in middle school, captain of Japan's strongest basketball club-Rakuzan High-, and a person who led me to finding my title of 'Phantom Sixth Man'... Akashi-kun was sitting on the left corner near the window; the table Hyuuga-san and the others had occupied before.

"Hello there, Tetsuya."

It was absolutely him, and no one else. The possibility of me being mistaken had turned zero as soon as I heard his voice.

But then, my eyebrows were once again furrowed. For a while, it had crossed my mind, that I wondered if I was hallucinating.

"Why are you here... and how did you get here...? Where are the others?" said I, looking onto the form of my former captain who had not changed since I last saw him in the Winter Cup: still the same heterochromatic eyes, fairly short bangs on the scorching red hair, and oddly mesmerizing smile.

"I simply had them all go out of here for a while, for I need to talk to you privately."

"How about Owner-san...?"

"He also went out of here."

"... Impossible, isn't it?"

But he only smirked.

"Come here, Tetsuya. Explaining the matter of unnecessary people will just waste my time."

His lips were curved in a very peculiar smile. It was eerie, and honestly speaking, I felt like running away for the creepy atmosphere and silence, but it was Akashi-kun and I know well that running away wasn't served as an option.

"But where are exactly the others...? My teammates...?"

"Please, just take a seat and let that question be answered last. I have a much more important matter to talk about."

His hand pointed on the chair across his; on the table was two bowls of ramen and two glasses of iced tea. Assuming from how it was placed, one bowl and one iced tea were arranged for me.

I presumed it was his plan to create such creepy atmosphere, but how he did it in a blink of an eye was questionable. I would ask, but I knew Akashi-kun would just say the same thing of needing to talk about the important matter.

I sat and looked straight at his heterochromatic eyes and smiling face.

"I have prepared a share of ramen for you. You like Miso Ramen, don't you?"

Gazing to inside the bowl, indeed it was my favorite menu in the shop. Though: "How did Akashi-kun know...?"

"I remember you picking a bowl of Miso Ramen every time we have lunch together back in the middle school."

"Ah... Thank you." I could only thank him; even though I didn't remember picking ramen that much at middle school, and how Akashi-kun could observe my choices well is fairly questioned.

"You may eat it while we talk."

"No, it's alright... If this is an important matter, then I shall pay attention to Akashi-kun, for I can save this bowl for later."

"Why, thank you," he said, and then rustled on his bag-placed by the side of his chair. "That would be efficient. I only have little time, after all."

What he took out was a rather small sand hourglass.

"I only have time until this hourglass runs out of sand."

Why he used such hourglass, I clearly didn't understand. Moreover, it was not like Akashi-kun to carry such item; an antique would possibly be only carried by someone like Midorima-kun.

But putting that aside, I spoke up as soon as Akashi-kun started turning the sand hourglass upside down and had it running-the only thing that could show time, since the clock wasn't ticking at all, probably caused by an electricity cut.

"What is it, that Akashi-kun would like to talk to me about?"

He briefly closed his eyes, lowering his head a little, then immediately looked at me in a sharp stare.

"The fact that I love you, Tetsuya."

**.  
.**

**-III-**

Shuddering wasn't what I did, neither did I gasp or show any signs of surprise. But I clearly felt a skip of heartbeat in me, and my hands turned cold despite the stagnant air due to idle fan.

"Akashi-kun... Loves me?"

"Yes." his voice was bold and straight, as if it was flat and emotionless. Though, for the silence was deafening and my body froze in surprise, I could tell it was completely an honest and sincere statement. Especially that it was Akashi-kun- "I won't say it if I don't mean it in the first place."

I gripped my hand tight. "But, why me?"

"I told you on the first time we met, didn't I? That you're interesting—and I saw something in you."

"I thought it was within the matters of basketball."

"I also thought so. But I was wrong. As time goes by, I gradually feel attracted to you."

His words were too blunt that the wristband from Ogiwara-kun on my arm suddenly felt like burning in contrast to my chilling skins. The sudden 'affectionate' words made me feel uneasy. I was glad to know that Akashi-kun had actually had such feelings for me, but on the other side I couldn't help feeling that something was off, considering the bizarre situation.

"If I may ask," I cleared my throat. "What do you find interesting in me, Akashi-kun?"

"I haven't quite thought of the exact reasons yet."

I blinked my eyes. I unconsciously had sipped a little of the iced tea to cool me down—the tense me, the freezing me; I was certain that the iced tea was even hotter to the frigid me.

"It'd take me about ten hours to explain what made me interested in you, Tetsuya; it's indescribable and unexplainable." Akashi-kun folded his hands together, and leaned to his chair with his eyes still directed at mine. "After all, wise men have always said that love is indescribable and unconditional."

A vague feeling crept into the pores of my skin. For Akashi-kun to have no exact reasoning is truly suspicious, that I wanted to know what exactly his reasons are. "Some does say that love is connected by a certain invisible red thread between us… Do Akashi-kun's eyes see these threads being connected between us?"

But he shook his head. "No," he briefly raised his index finger to point at his own eyes. "My eyes don't see what is mythical. But I can tell, Tetsuya, that I can see your chest pounding hard and fast."

On a spur of moment, I realized that my chest was pounding as fast as racing cars. It was beating so hard that it was most likely audible even from Akashi-kun's place; though I hoped not.

"Akashi-kun suddenly confessing, moreover in such state… I can't help but feel nervous."

"Oh, nervous? Why so?" Soon I questioned of why did Akashi-kun ask such an obvious thing. I've repeated to myself in this pitiful narration over and again, that the situation had cornered me into a… painfully thrilling state of affairs.

Still innately tugging on my wristband, I lowered my face, having my bangs cover my eyes partly. I tore away off the pressuring gaze. "… I'm afraid that I can't answer to Akashi-kun's confession right now, because…"

"Because you like Kagami Taiga?"

I gasped, but not raising my head up because I was afraid to meet the red and yellow eyes. I slightly trembled again, the chill growing in my spines, and even my lips were too immobilized to speak.

Akashi-kun was partly true, that I had grown small feelings towards my partner, Kagami-kun. Though, I didn't know how did he figure about my feelings out. "Being my light in Seirin, I've grown certain closeness with Kagami-kun… I won't say that I like him, but…"

"But what, Tetsuya?" I was again, cornered. I suppose it was true that I had liked Kagami-kun. But his name being brought up in his confession was truly unexpected—it had caused a slight displeasure in me. My throbbing heart was suddenly aching as well; a feeling I couldn't describe in one word.

.

'_Yes, I like Kagami-kun.'_

It was what I wanted to say, when in the end I came to only biting my lower lip as I heard Akashi-kun speaking before I could answer.

"You're very easy to predict, Tetsuya. I can easily tell your feelings and intentions. In that feeble and hollow expression, I can tell everything about you."

What Akashi-kun said is very contradictive to what people—my teammates, Midorima-kun, Riko-san, everyone—say about my eyes and face. They would say how unpredictable I am and how hard it is to read my feelings.

"Then, please," still not raising my face, I inquired, "pray tell me, what can Akashi-kun tell about me? The unobvious facts you can see from my face…"

I was only curious. It was probably a waste of time, but Akashi-kun's unique abilities had always amused me, whether it's his ability in terms of basketball, or at these casual moments.

**.**

**.**

**-IV-**

"Oh?" He broke his folded hands free, and fixed his sitting position. "I'm afraid they're overly offensive or unpleasant, since I will probably tweak your secrets. But again—it's only the two of us here. People outside won't hear us."

"I suppose I don't mind, then." Akashi-kun is an analytical person, and I sure expect surprising turn of events with him. In every match with Akashi-kun involved in it, there have always been surprises. So I simply listened to what he had to say.

But he didn't immediately start speaking; there was a knock on the table—a sound of something solid yet light being placed on the table. In reflex, I looked up to the table to see what was placed:

A static seven inch-tall figure of Aomine-kun and Kagami-kun.

I threw a confused look; why did Akashi-kun bring such things? Where did Akashi-kun get these from? Akashi-kun had never been as strange as that day. I wished my eyes were wrong and that I was hallucinating, but no matter how I blink, there were all as real as the iced tea I sipped.

Akashi-kun then lifted Aomine-kun's static figure.

"You liked Daiki." Even though I anticipated surprises, I had to admit that my heart skipped a beat. "You're grateful for him to have found you in the basketball court in Teikou back then, for he had given you a chance to practice and made it into the first string. But your precious feelings ceased as soon as he changed into Teikou's first blooming prodigy and he started skipping practices. You hesitated to approach him since then."

"Then, comes Kagami Taiga." He threw away Aomine-kun's static figure to the floor. I only averted my gaze a bit, but my eyes continued to look at Akashi-kun, ignoring the thrown away static figure. "Unlike Daiki, Kagami Taiga shows much more affection towards you, that you're most likely mutual. In your face, whenever you're tagging along with Kagami Taiga, I can tell clearly how you're attached to him, Tetsuya."

Sparing a little time to think, I had to agree to what Akashi-kun said. Every of his words weren't a lie—Akashi-kun meant it all, and he read right through… not my feeble face, but my heart. I didn't expect, though, for him to pay such a detailed attention towards me.

"… And perhaps should I mention that the glint in your eyes whenever you see that ace of Seirin's, tell that you're feeling that he is the best man you can find to replace Daiki?"

I wrinkled my brows. "I didn't intend on making Kagami-kun any replacement."

"Oh?" Akashi-kun's lips curled into a smirk. "But back then in the Winter Cup match with Touou Academy, your face tells that you hoped that you could still stay with Daiki."

I exhaled lightly. I averted my gaze into the blistering window beside our table. Little flashback had occurred in my mind, to the heart-wrenching match with Touou Academy.

"I suppose I did have such thought in mind…" said I, as I looked at Akashi-kun's eyes. Determination what was I tried to give, as I spoke, "But I'm fine the way I am, with Kagami-kun now."

But Akashi-kun caught a different interpretation: "Doesn't that mean that you would have liked it better if you stayed with Daiki?"

I halted my fingers on my wristband. I was still toying my fingers on my wristband, but Akashi-kun's words had frozen me; this time even more, that my wristband felt as cold as my skin surfaces. I was suddenly numb—a certain pressure hit me.

Perhaps it was caused by these two things: that the topic was supposed to be of me and Akashi-kun, and second, that I've never spoken about my feelings at all. Now that Akashi-kun lumped it all at once in the surface, it seemed as if he could read every single movement of mine.

"I—"

"Admit it, Tetsuya. This is the worst part of you; that you've always been only chasing after the strongest light for victory, and mistook your closeness to the light as attraction."

I clenched my teeth.

"No, Akashi-kun. It's only a mere coincidence that they're all my lights… And I'm not even after them for victory. It IS Akashi-kun, after all, who had always gone for victory." I had stated that I wouldn't be offended for if Akashi-kun said all those things, but the truth was that I had gone overboard with my rising emotions. My words were uncontrollable; a freezing heat flowed through my veins, causing my body to tremble—perhaps in an unsightly way—for part of me was afraid that I was too harsh.

"Tetsuya," Akashi-kun's tone was calm, yet a flaming emotion was intended in it. "You're indeed very foolish."

He rose up his chair slowly, that I had to tilt my head slightly to look up at his eyes.

"I have never sought for victory. I've always been only gifted, thus victory isn't actually an importance to me. It has always been you, who had been trying to search for a light to stand by, and seek for victory."

"But at Teikou, it was Akashi-kun who insisted on us to always seek for victory."

"Oh? Wasn't it basically because of the basketball team's philosophy? If it wasn't for the philosophy, then I have no need in pursuing for victory."

"To me, it actually looks more like as if you're hiding a pressure to maintain your crown, Akashi-kun."

"Pressure, why would I? Victory is only momentary. I don't see it as anything necessary. You're the pressured one, Tetsuya. You unconsciously go around seeking for lights to achieve victory with, because you have never achieved the victory you've always dreamed of."

It had grown more like a debate. I took a moment to stop talking, for my heart was racing even faster. I could feel my blood tension rising. I panted slowly, and had my eyes closed briefly to take a deep breath.

"Tetsuya."

I opened my eyes again, looking at Akashi-kun's eyes. His expression didn't falter into any angry; instead, it turned into a rather saddened one, which then surprised me.

"Perhaps why you considered my acts as efforts to gain victory was because… That I did not hold back and create an overly handicapped match by going easy on all of you?"

I slowly lowered my head. I pondered for a while as I start tugging on my wristband again. And instead of feeling any chilly anymore, all I felt was scorching heat, my blood being paced fast due to my rapid heartbeat.

"… Maybe."

"Then, would you want to know why?"

I blinked my eyes—I didn't expect for Akashi-kun to have a reason behind his maximum-effort matches. So I simply nodded, but not looking at Akashi-kun.

"Why, I only wanted you to know that I'm someone that you can rely on; someone who doesn't give importance to winning yet still triumphs nonetheless. But this hint was actually misinterpreted." said he, while having his hands on the table. "And, despite being someone who doesn't have either a bright light or a shadow by my side, I have triumphed over Daiki, then Kagami Taiga; your lights."

His words were paused with a slight click of tongue. There was a slight pause, but I had intentionally not spoken since I knew that Akashi-kun still had something to say.

"What I'm trying to say, is that today, I want to prove that I am a much better person than those lights, despite not being one with any light."

I was surprised.

"I want to show you that I am better than Daiki or Kagami Taiga. And, that I can give you something more than victory; something that lasts longer than it… my feelings."

**.**

**.**

**-V-**

The previously heated situation cooled down slightly. In Akashi-kun's gaze I could tell he was sincere, and hearing such bitter yet sweet-ending contentions from him had made me somehow smile.

"Akashi-kun, you are indeed the best." I acclaimed, with a slow and soft voice—the softest tone I could speak with.

"But then, Akashi-kun has pointed out very many of my indecency—while Akashi-kun is such an excellent person. Don't you think that I'm only a hindrance and disappointment—like what you've said to me in the Winter Cup back then?"

Still standing off his chair, Akashi-kun sparsely smiled. I saw amusement through his smile.

"Hmph, as I've thought… Must everything be well in order to accept someone? I have my disappointments and doubts towards you, but I'm willing to tolerate it, for I can't be wrong; that I've sincerely loved you and disregard the fact of your… indecencies."

"… What if Akashi-kun is wrong and that you'd only find more disappointments in me in the future? Or that I can't accept your sincere feelings…?"

A silence followed after. Akashi-kun's gaze dimmed; his smile faded away in a moment, and the air had suddenly grown frigid once more. I had to admit how I was speaking absurdity-for I had this vague feelings towards him—and that absurdity wouldn't be pleasant to Akashi-kun.

I watched his two hands gripping tight on the edges of the table after he threw away the static figure of Kagami-kun to the floor.

"Why, Tetsuya?"

A severe glance was directed at me. I gasped at the contact, fear slowly engulfing me into the unthawing coldness.

"What do I lack, Tetsuya? What more do you need from me?"

I continued to tug on my wristband due to my nervousness. "No… I only think that I might haven't known Akashi-kun too well , that I doubt I can accept you yet… To be honest, I have found you as a merely strict former captain of mine, and I have yet to find how to return these much affections…"

"Is it because that we live so far away now, that we hardly spend time with each other, resulting in not knowing each other too well?"

"… maybe."

His eyes looked at me with little sparks of anger in them. "… Did you think that this whole time, after we graduated from middle school, I haven't been paying any attention to you…?"

"Eh…?"

Akashi-kun slammed the table quite harshly all of the sudden, that I stopped my innate tugging immediately, my mouth shrieked slightly, and my eyes squinting in surprise. The impact echoed soundly throughout the ramen shop, but was followed after Akashi-kun's voice.

"I left you be after the graduation… Because I thought you'd need some time alone to improve your basketball skills, and that I don't want to interfere with your basketball." Said he, "But in the end, I was wrong; I should've stayed by your side so that you wouldn't have to lose your shadow…"

I had never expected of it all to be part of Akashi-kun's plan.

Perhaps because Akashi-kun had always thought two… three… or five steps further, that I could hardly think that he did everything for my sake.

"Among all, you've the only one who had ever wronged me… Tetsuya."

.

I didn't know how my countenance exactly was, but I felt a sympathy… A strong feeling. To think that Akashi-kun had fallen for someone like me, I couldn't help but feel that it was a pity;

"But, Akashi-kun… There are so many better people out there…"

I insisted. I needed to make sure that Akashi-kun didn't waste on someone like me.

But the hourglass hadn't run out of its sand yet, and Akashi-kun, like he had never been, disagreed to my opinion again after a little gap.

"Didn't I tell you? It'll take me about ten hours to explain of what is interesting in you; while I have said all my disappointments in you."

"…!"

I slowly lowered my head.

After all the tension, the somehow sugar-coated words had heated up me—only my face—and I bit my lower lip as the warmth crept onto my ears.

Still, though, I couldn't understand what would Akashi-kun has to say in those ten hours, but on the other side, I couldn't help to stop my rapid heartbeat. All I did was stare at my wristband, and I had asked myself for times, _'Ogiwara-kun, what should I do…?'_

And I decided to shut my eyes and took a deep breath.

.

When I opened my eyes,

.

I realized that the wristband from Ogiwara-kun was no longer attached.

"Eh…?"

I tilted my head up to Akashi-kun, and was astonished to what I had seen; my wristband was in Akashi-kun's possession.

**.**

**.**

**-VI-**

"Did you know," he said, "That I've been watching you tugging on this wristband from Ogiwara Shigehiro the whole time?"

Taken aback by his words and the mentioning of Ogiwara-kun's name, I stuttered in a moment, and simply watched the wristband being thrown away to the side of our table.

In reflex, I stood up to catch the wristband, but a quick-witted arm had prevented me when I was just about to crouch and get the black wristband.

I paused my movements, as I slowly looked up onto the face of the person who had halted me by only reaching his hand out. Akashi-kun had his usual serious face—not a smile, not any frown; just his usual gaze.

Slowly did I retract my arm, and straightened my body to stand in the same height as Akashi-kun.

"Akashi-kun…"

The whole warmth had turned bleary. But given the proximity between me and Akashi-kun, I had felt a whole different atmosphere.

"I'm sorry." He apologized, his eyes briefly closed as if giving me a bow. "I got carried away."

But I kept silent. Still I was immobilized due to the tension. I would speak—if my mouth hadn't told me to wait for Akashi-kun's next words.

"I was only jealous; for someone to be hold that dear to you… I wish I could be one."

.

.

It was a little reflex.

.

I had lingered my touch of one hand on Akashi-kun's cheek, my eyes repressing certain sympathy—even though I know that Akashi-kun is not one to be sympathized, but I had done such thing subconsciously.

His red and golden eyes twitched slightly, but then his expression faltered into a very, very gentle smile; a smile that somehow had calmed the whole pressure down at once. Timid wasn't the correct word to describe the smile, but perhaps his inner thoughts had laughed over my sympathy for him.

"Tetsuya."

He leaned into my touch. Up his hand went, overlapping into mind, giving a warm feeling on my skin. My heartbeat began to pace up again, this time not for any negativity, nor would I call it any positive thing. It was only a blurry feeling… Something unfamiliar, yet similar to one I would usually feel around Kagami-kun or Aomine-kun in the past; but they're not the same either, that I couldn't specify what exactly was it.

"I must've scared you since the moment this conversation started."

I gulped slightly.

"… Akashi-kun is acting weird."

"How is it weird?"

"Akashi-kun has surprised me a lot." I averted my gaze to the table side. "I've been surprised countless times. From the fact that you have affections towards me, knowing your observations of me and my lights, knowing how much you persist that I need to accept your feelings, and… The fact that you know about my wristband."

Though I didn't mention of the strange hourglass and figures—

But as soon as I altered my sight, I had just realized that the static figures weren't on the floor—the floor was completely clean. I skipped a heartbeat at the fact, wrinkling my eyebrow slightly and I wondered where did the static figures went after Akashi-kun threw it away—but I was distracted by Akashi-kun's voice.

"Hm."

Just a little hum, then Akashi-kun let go of my touch on his cheek.

"I see you're astonished by my tricks of the day, no?"

I subtly nodded, retracting my hand but not stepping back, maintaining the proximity between our faces.

"It was only this morning until I figured out how to do all these tricks." He chuckled lightly. Still he had the gentle expression on his face; it had even grown wider. "Reading your thoughts profoundly was rather hard, though. Especially when I found out that you had assumed how little I had taken part in your life."

"But Akashi-kun had made me notice your affectionate acts in the past few minutes, no?"

He nodded. "Right. And I'm glad you understood."

"Still… Knowing about Ogiwara-kun…? That was part of the trick?" I tilted my head, inquiring.

"Of course."

"How…?"

Then he took his index finger up to my mouth, hissing and asking me to silence my questioning by placing his tip of finger on my lips.

"You'll figure it later as soon as you come out of this room, Tetsuya."

But I was still confused. I didn't know what he meant by saying so.

"Then let's leave… I can't bear too much curiosity." Then I turned my heels to the direction of the exit door of the ramen shop, initiating a step to go outside at once, but Akashi-kun had grabbed my hand and pulled me back—to a distance even closer than before.

"Curious bee, aren't you, Tetsuya." He chuckled as he murmured nearby my ears, the voice being heard in clarity. "I'm afraid I still have to halt you for a moment more, though."

Releasing the grip on my wrist, I turned my back to Akashi-kun again, meeting his eyes.

"It's only a matter of seconds until the hourglass runs out of sand." He said. I looked at the nearly half-empty hourglass, and I nodded; since I had agreed to comply and listen to Akashi-kun until the hourglass says 'time's up'.

"I should ask you, then, to conclude everything."

His heterochromatic eyes were looking at me straight. I, too, didn't try to avert my gaze or anything, and had opened my ears for the very last moments of the odd conversation.

.

"I love you."

.

I twitched at hearing the heavy-suppressing three words.

"Do you return the same feelings for me?"

**.**

**.**

**-VII-**

I didn't thwart my gaze off Akashi-kun, but I merely shook my head. My hands gripped tight at their places, my legs standing still.

"No, I don't."

Unlike what had happened before, I didn't either shiver or tremble. I was nervous, but that hadn't kept me from concluding everything; for the end of the conversation is near.

"Though, I do appreciate everything Akashi-kun had given to me, up until now. But rather than forcing myself to say that I like you, or letting it be a one-sided relationship… I must refuse, Akashi-kun."

Akashi-kun proceeded to take my hand that I could feel his warm palms. Continued with a mild smile—the smile he had always shown in middle school-, he exhaled a little, then tightened his grip on my right palm.

"Thank you, Tetsuya. I sincerely thank you."

"Ah, I should be the ones thanking you…"

"No. To have my question answered honestly, it's something that satisfies me a lot."

I couldn't help but be allured by the gentle warmth on my hands and the warmth in Akashi-kun's words that my body had somehow heated up.

"I hadn't hoped of a positive answer, after all. I only wanted to confess in the first place, and perhaps convince you to return my feelings, but I couldn't and I shouldn't force you to. After all, I'm now relieved that I've confessed all I could before I leave."

I blinked my eyes. "Akashi-kun is leaving?"

"Yes. To somewhere far that we'd possibly lose contact."

"Somewhere farther than Kyoto?"

"Hm, true; which is why I want to come and say all of this today, and hear your answer so I can leave at content."

"Ah…" Still letting my hand on Akashi-kun's possession, I murmured. "Just now I thought I'd give a try to reconsider and learn… how to… return… your… love…" My voice gradually turned nearly inaudible. I altered my gaze to the floor then.

"Oh?" He smirked. "I thought you said you liked Kagami Taiga?"

"… I assumed so, but," My voice was still barely at its normal volume. "Just as what Akashi-kun has pointed out; I've mistaken closeness for affection… and perhaps, this vague feeling for nothing."

"A vague feeling towards me, Tetsuya? You didn't mention of it."

I hummed slightly to give a gap. "I do have a feeling towards Akashi-kun. But I'm not sure what is it exactly; it's not any attraction, nor detestation. So I think… Today's answer might not still be the same as a few week later's… If you give me some more time, that is."

Akashi-kun only smiled, then took my hand up to his lips, brushing his tip of dry surface on my thumb. I twitched a bit at that, my eyes slightly squinting in process.

"There's no need—I'm afraid I can't look forward to your answer, Tetsuya. And that's why I thank you from the bottom of my heart for today."

My heart skipped a beat.

"Also, I'll leave you to Kagami Taiga." Said he, his warm breath diffusing on my hand. "I believe that you'd get along well with him, rather than Daiki."

I was kept silent—I didn't think Akashi-kun would give me up to Kagami-kun in an instant. It wasn't disappointment in the slightest, but I had a peculiarity; I didn't know why.

I altered my gaze, avoiding the topic of mentioning Kagami-kun or Aomine-kun to prevent further confusing in my own mind. I noticed that the sand in the hourglass had completely been turned upside down, meaning that the time was over for Akashi-kun. "Ah…" I uttered, in reflex, as I saw the empty hourglass.

"The time is finally over." said Akashi-kun, in an overly clear voice as he let go of my hand.

A mellow smile followed his words, the red and golden eyes glimmer in his unusually mild countenance. His expression was soft; I would've smiled in return if it was anyone else, but it was Akashi-kun, and I couldn't help but feel uneasy.

"You may go out now, Tetsuya. I think that's all I need to say."

I nodded in response and took my bag in advance—but the salute, on the contrary, had halted my on marching any further to the exit door. For our conversation was left hanging, I had asked to reaffirm of Akashi-kun's departure.

"Um…" I was rather hesitant. "When is Akashi-kun leaving, if I may know…?"

But instead, he chuckled slightly at my words. "What is it, Tetsuya? Do you want to bid me some farewell?"

I slightly tilted my head. "I suppose so… I mean, it seems that I won't be meeting Akashi-kun for a while, no? The generation of miracles will absolutely lose your presence."

"It'll be quite some time, Tetsuya. And I appreciate your thought—but there isn't anything I can do. After all, the generation of miracles have no need in me, and I've no business with them. I only had to settle things with you before I leave; that's all."

I furrowed my eyebrows slightly; somehow saddened by the fact that Akashi-kun will be leaving for a long time. As someone very flashy, respected, honored and famous for his empyrean title, I had no doubt that Akashi-kun will be missed if he ever goes missing. Aside that, despite the fact that I hardly ever speak with Akashi-kun, I was certain that I'd feel like something is missing in my life.

"But don't worry; I won't forget you." Akashi-kun added, before I could respond to his previous words. "And I hope you won't forget me, Tetsuya."

My hand had unconsciously moved on its own onto caressing Akashi-kun's cheek once again, my eyes profoundly staring onto his eyes, as I said, "I won't forget Akashi-kun."

His previously rather droopy eyes had briefly turned wide again.

"Tetsuya," he called, "I might be unable to offer your any token of memoir such as this wristband," then Akashi-kun picked Ogiwara-kun's wristband off the floor, then attaching it to my slowly retracting hand. His tug had made me shudder a bit, but it was moreover caused by his following favor: "But if you allow me to, I want to give you something memorable."

I tilted my head. "Of course you may, Akashi-kun."

"Even if it's a kiss?"

**.**

**.**

**-VIII-**

Temperature had rose in my whole body; my spines shuddering and my face heating up in an instant as soon as I heard the unfamiliar word. My mouth was slightly opened in respond—I was speechless, as no one had even asked me to kiss before. I thought Akashi-kun had felt my heating body as well; even my wrists were feeling the impact the one little word had caused in me.

"A… kiss?" I even had to reaffirm.

"Yes. Just a little peck, if I may."

I had closed my eyes, in order for myself to think. I had thousands of reconsideration to sort up, and since I wasn't planning on postponing for too long, I ended up only giving a nod, not opening up my eyes.

"… yes…"

I murmured in the silent room. I didn't even bother on opening my eyes—I lowered my bangs to hide my flustered face, but it seemed that it was still clearly visible.

"Chill down, Tetsuya."

Then I felt Akashi-kun's hand caressing my cheek like I did. A gentle rub, a soothing feel of skin on my cheek. It was warmer than usual, caused by my own body temperature rising as Akashi-kun's breath gradually grew intensified within our proximity.

It was quick; I hadn't realized that it all had passed by the time Akashi-kun's breath started to leave my skin's sensitivity. Then I felt a touch of fingertip lingering on my lips as soon as I opened my eyelids.

"You're indeed very delicate, Tetsuya. And fragrant, as well." Akashi-kun's index finger then slid into the side of my mouth, as if trailing on my lips slowly.

"Fragrant?" I questioned.

"Yes; you had some certain fragrant on your hand."

I smelt my own hand—thumb, to be exact, and had realized that the soap leftover in the toilet back then had caused so. "Ah… It was soap. I couldn't wash it because the sink suddenly turned off earlier…"

Akashi-kun chuckled. "I guess I was too hasty in beginning the trick."

"Anyway, you should go now. I'm sure your teammates are waiting outside." Akashi-kun then removed his touch off me. I suddenly remembered of my teammates again, and immediately had in thought that they might have been worried of me.

I nodded and took a few steps backward, increasing the gap between me and Akashi-kun, as I curtly bowed. "Thank you, Akashi-kun." I said, along with a smile painted on my face.

"You don't need to thank me, Tetsuya." From the distance, I could still see Akashi-kun's warm smile, as he bent his body to bow in return. "It's a pity though, that in the end, we couldn't enjoy the ramen together."

The word ramen had rang a bell on me, in which I was supposed to eat a share of ramen from Akashi-kun.

"Ah, that… We can eat it after this, no?"

"No, Tetsuya. I'm also leaving as soon as you do."

"Then Akashi-kun should also be exiting this way, right…?"

"Apparently, to conclude my trick, I'm afraid I must use the backdoor. You'll figure the trick sooner or later as you step outside; and you'll know where I'm going."

It was odd that I had to figure it out myself; the trick, the backdoor, it all sounded like nonsense. But since it was what Akashi-kun said, all I did was comply as he wants. I continued to walk to the door to outside, while Akashi-kun remained standing beside our table.

"I'll look forward to meeting Akashi-kun again, then." I politely bowed again. "After all, Akashi-kun has my phone number… If you ever plan on returning here, I'd be glad to accompany Akashi-kun and have a ramen lunch together."

My former captain had only let out a single chuckle as I turned my back against the empyrean eyes. My heels were moving in a boisterous way for some burdensome feeling had gotten into me.

I pressed down on the no longer locked door handle, with the heavy feeling still occupying my body as I stepped outside. Upon stepping out of the ramen shop, the blistering sunrays had crept into my previously dimmed eyes, and the noises of the streets came gradually audible in my ears; it had caused a slight screech as it varied too much compared to the absence of sound of when I talked with Akashi-kun.

Striding out of the ramen shop, I could finally regain my usual sight, my eyes finally adjusting to the sunlight. What came first onto my view were my friends—my Seirin teammates, Kagami-kun standing nearest to the door, that I ran into him as soon as I came out.

"Kuroko!" Kagami-kun came running at me, his face smeared in worry.

"Ah… Have I kept you waiting too long? The talk was—"

"You were nowhere to be found—where were you?"

"Eh?" Bewildered, I tilted my head.

"You excused yourself to the toilet and disappeared!"

Astonished, I furrowed my brows a little. "I was inside; I was talking with…"

"Who?"

"Akashi… kun…?"

"Eh? Hm?" Kagami-kun showed a baffled expression, mismatched statements being the cause. "If you were inside anyway, I would've spotted you or at least that redhead. You can't be invisible, aren't you…?"

I gasped.

"Don't tell me you're hallucinating, Kuroko."

But I knew how real Akashi-kun was, and the assumption that I was hallucinating was clearly impossible. I wondered if it was part of the trick, but it wouldn't have involved alternate spaces.

"No… I was inside, and I was talking to Akashi-kun for about fifteen minutes."

"Eh?" The man in front of me raised an eyebrow. And Hyuuga-san, who had heard us, told me: "I don't know what nonsense are you spouting, but, Kuroko, we've been inside for an hour for lunch—over thirty minutes to look for you—and you're nowhere inside."

The coach as well, rushed at me and said, "Kagami even had fifteen bowls because you took too long. And now here you are, popping in front of the door!"

I palmed my face as I lowered my head. My mind turned absurd and messed up as soon as I tried to fixate of what could've happened during then.

The time lapse, the overlapping place, my missing presence… everything had grown illogical while I was sure that it was really Akashi-kun. If it was a trick, I couldn't figure out at all how did it all happen.

"That voice… That grip on my wrist... That kis—"

Suddenly, my phone rang; the vibration caused me to jolt in surprise. It was a call, and I was surprised to see who was on the phone.

"Kuro-chin?"

"…Murasakibara-kun?"

Surely people were surrounding me, and the streets were lively as it was still in the noon and the sun still shone bright—but as I heard Murasakibara-kun's voice on the phone, I felt the world fading into grey, and myself covered with curtains that had shoved me into an acute heartache, my vision dispersed into blank in a moment; for the words that had crept into my eardrums were,

That Akashi-kun passed away in the morning.

.

.

.

**.**

**.**

**-IX-**

The train didn't take too long to arrive to Kyoto; reaching kilometers away the ramen shop had only taken me two hours. I didn't want to postpone any longer as well, that I ran to the address as written in Murasakibara-kun's email.

The skies were orange, smeared with little pinks. The skies were clear, and Kyoto hadn't changed since last time I went there. It wasn't much different compared to the streets around Seirin either; not too crowded, yet pretty lively.

Though, as I started to get nearer to the included address, the crowd chatters gradually left my audible range. The scape in my sight had no one but trees and falling leaves, but rows of cars parked along the streets I walked along.

I had to phone Murasakibara-kun and confirm whether it was the right address or not—It was my first time visiting in Akashi-kun's house which looked more like one complex neighborhood. But Murasakibara-kun was busy—I presumed the funeral was in process, and that I'd prefer to not disturb. I decided to have one of the guards in the yards to take me to the shrine. My identity was of course, questioned, but mentioning my full name had somehow ringed a bell in the guard's mind:

"You're Teikou Middle School's former phantom sixth man, right?"

Odd was how I described it. I was surprised, yet I was more likely engulfed by the tacit scene; as I followed down the guard, I could hear few chanting and prayers.

.

.

"Excuse me…" I peeked in, and waited until the prayers had been done, then slowly stepped inside the shrine.

The shrine's wooden floors had been scented by some certain powder I couldn't recognize—or was it the incenses, I couldn't tell—but being occupied by quite a number of people, I could hardly walk around and I ended up only standing in front of the shrine doors.

Following along the prayers, I could only lower my head, while wondering where Murasakibara-kun was, or that I might've been too late. Moreover, I was afraid to cause any disturbances, since despite my usually thin presence, I wore a fancy and standing-out Seirin jersey amongst the black-suited men; presumably Akashi-kun's father's colleagues. Suspicion is imminent, yet I decided to stay and wait until I could at least get to see Akashi-kun's… casket.

After a set of prayers, everyone began to murmur again, some leaving the shrine, and the room was much clearer than it was that I could finally advance, little by little. Chilled by the tense atmosphere, I felt my expression being static—not showing any grief, yet not any matter of frowning.

Slowly I advanced to the front rows, where I could start to clearly see Murasakibara-kun in his casual long-sleeved wear. He was, as usual, standing out in midst of the crowd due to his massive height. From a distance, I called out to him in a slow voice, afraid to cause too much noises, but he did not respond. Taking a few more moments to stride further, I finally arrived at Murasakibara-kun's broad back; my view blocked by his towering stature.

Facing up to his purple hair, I called once again, my palm poking at his back softly.

"Murasakibara-kun…"

I was surprised. Despite his usually ingenious or flat expression, I saw through his face—countless words of grievance and an unwise frown; a face that shouldn't have been shown to anyone else.

I gasped, and in a moment, I felt my heart racing faster than before. An uneasy feeling came onto me.

"Kuro-chin…" His voice was absolutely normal. Murasakibara-kun's voice has always been just flat, but I was certain that at that time, there was something more behind his rather low voice. I looked at him with my eyebrows slightly raised in sympathy.

"Here, you can take my place." He then pulled my infirm shoulders and had me standing in front of him as he stepped back a bit to give some space for me. "It's Aka-chin… Better bid your farewell to his dignified form."

I had nothing to say but shudder as I was allowed to take a better view around. First I saw Akashi-kun's teammates in Rakuzan High School; Mibuchi-san, Hayama-san, Eikichi-san and Mayuzumi-san, all of their faces tarnished with condolences. Next was Akashi-kun's father, whom I could recognize immediately for he was standing and welcoming few guests, dressed in a completely formal funereal suit. Then last but not least was the wooden and partly glassed casket—undoubtedly with Akashi-kun inside—and Akashi-kun's photo being framed well and nice, placed not far from the casket. Beside the photo were a set of incenses, candles and neatly arranged potted orchids.

Peaceful was how I described the arrangements, and just by the mere sight, I had tears welling up in my eyes before I realized it. I was unable to say any words. My trembling hand was raised to cover my little jaw drop.

It was hard to believe—that someone like Akashi-kun would no longer be around.

The fact that I can no longer see him, that I can never talk to him, and that I had lost the person who held me so dearly… And that it was late for me to realize how I regret for not returning my feelings to my former captain.

More than anything, it was unavoidable to say as well, that I—we had lost a form of an exponent. Akashi-kun is even suited to be called as a hero; one who leads us, the Generation of Miracles, in being prodigies, and one who had always let Rakuzan maintain its never-ending victory. Moreover Akashi-kun had always been a multitalented person; he has always been someone worth glorified for his Shogi plays, and worthy of being entitled as a perfect student.

It was very, very hard to imagine, how many people had grieved for his death, considering him to be someone as important.

.

.

Though what had put me in a deep agony was my personal regrets and pain.

.

.

"…Murasakibara-kun. I wonder if it's possible for me to get a little bit closer?" I inquired, though not raising my face even a bit to hide my despaired expressions to Murasakibara-kun.

His palm was put on my head. "…You want to see Aka-chin?"

I only nodded, while biting my lower lip, holding my tears that came out of nowhere. "Let's just try to walk forward." Said Murasakibara-kun, as he walked towards the open casket. Though he paused a bit at his glance of the casket, he beckoned as he turned his overly tedious face.

The more I marched, the more I felt that everyone was in great despair and sorrow.

And when I could finally get beside the open casket, the intense smell of incense welcomed me; it worked nearly like a door, and when I was supposed to say 'Hello', instead, I started to sob and the previously welling up tears had guttered in a spur of a moment.

It was hard to believe, after all, that everything I saw was real.

"Akashi-kun… This isn't a trick, isn't it…?"

I covered my teary face and tried my best to control my misery—at that time I was desperate to cry, yet it would be too disturbing. It wasn't my place to whimper, that I decided to only sob silently, keeping my urge to lament aside.

"Aka-chin looks… as if he's only sleeping."

"Yes…"

My lungs suddenly occupied by the many need to inhale and exhale shortly, my heart aching as painful as it's never been.

"Akashi-kun… Are you really gone?"

I couldn't believe what I saw with my own eyes: there lied Akashi-kun on an ephemeral flowerbed, flock of white lilies surrounding his body, several white roses decorating the edges of the casket. His hands were still bright, his eyes were closed as if he was still alive. It looked like as if Akashi-kun was only sleeping, putting aside the fact that breaths had no longer lie in him.

But I couldn't help but to recall the images of Akashi-kun in the ramen shop earlier. Was it a dream, hallucination or illusion—it was too real to be one, yet on another side too fake to be true.

Shedding my nonstop tears, Murasakibara-kun ruffled on my head, in an attempt to ease me down. "Aka-chin wouldn't be happy to see you mourning like this." Said he.

I rubbed on my wet eyelids, contemplating, while directing my gaze to Akashi-kun's body. _'Unbelievable, unbelievable'_ were all I could think of at that moment, that I could no longer differ which one was reality. But I nodded to Murasakibara-kun's words, trying to stop my tears from washing my face any more.

We walked to the side of the shrines, sitting down on empty chairs. I took a tissue to wipe my tears off my face, though it was still guttering relentlessly, hazing my vision. Meanwhile, Murasakibara-kun only sat down, being silenced.

Soon after we sat, Murasakibara-kun initiated a little conversation. "Kuro-chin... Have you seen him after the Winter Cup yet?"

I tilted my head. "Eh…? Y… No, I haven't—why is it?" I decided to hide the story of me and Akashi-kun in the ramen shop, for the most logical fact says that it was most likely an illusion.

"I see." Then I saw him descending his face upon hearing my answer. "No offense, but I don't think he'd go at ease… He has regrets."

"What regrets?" I furrowed my brows, leaning closer to Murasakibara-kun.

"… That he hadn't had any chance to tell how much he had always loved you."

I had to widen my still-teary eyes, a clench of teeth done. "What do you mean?" I asked, still trying to keep calm.

"Oh, well…" He stroked the back of his head before he proceeded to speak. "After the winter cup, I happen to meet Aka-chin, and he told me that he had always wanted to confess, yet he hadn't found any right time; you've always been stuck with Kagami since high school and every time you two meet, the condition is surprisingly always not quite right. While back then in middle school, Aka-chin doubted that it was probably too hasty to him to confess at such time."

I blinked my eyes, amused at what Murasakibara-kun said about Akashi-kun's considerations. It had caused me feeling even guiltier, and some tears had almost escaped my eyes gain.

But I asked again, "How did Murasakibara-kun know all these, though…?"

"I told you, Aka-chin had always loved you. Since he first met you and bought you to the first string, he often told me about his love for you. He sincerely loves you, Kuro-chin." Murasakibara-kun then looked at me. "That's why I think he's regretting his chances now."

"But if it's Aka-chin, I doubt he'd regret it though. He'd usually just wish the best for you. You should be ones regretting, though, since you'll be missing someone who loves you to an abnormal extent."

A few drops of tears came down wetting my face again upon hearing the story. His story blended well with what Akashi-kun had said in the illusion—or so it was how I assumed it. There was a slight relief in me, that the trick I had seen was not partially untrue either. Though on the other side, an indescribable misery caused me to continue trembling, my heart aching too much as if it nearly stopped.

Then I rose off my chair, bowing down to Murasakibara-kun. "Akashi-kun won't regret it—I've already regretted it all, just by hearing your story, Murasakibara-kun. And I thank you for telling me all this."

In a hasty movement, I took my bag and excused myself, leaving my friend alone in the shrine amongst the black-suited crowd. I had rushed out of the shrine and picked up my pace to walk out of Akashi-kun's complex, yet my gaze faltered as I slowly reduced my pace and eventually stopped;

I was halted by my overflowing tears.

I was sad, I was in a horrible grievance, I bawled hard in the middle of the lonely darkening roads.

"Akashi-kun…"

Regret was my biggest problem, mixed with agony, misery and other sad feelings. I had never felt such thing before, and I'd never ever want to.

The last story from Murasakibara-kun had knocked me right off the edge—to falling in love completely with Akashi-kun.

I realized then, that in the first place, Akashi-kun was the one who had given me the opportunity to join the first string in Teikou. He was the one who guided me to being a phantom sixth man. And he did everything for the sake of my basketball, while he doesn't actually care about basketball that much…

That day, I had realized how nonchalant and egoistic I've always been.

.

.

.

.

.

**.**

**.**

**-X: Final-**

I had arrived home a couple hours later—all alone in the train, my rather reddened eyes clearly displayed on my countenance, and my deadpanned eyes not even showing any signs of life.

I was starving, yet the moment I went home, I rushed to my bedroom, even ignoring my parents' call of asking what had happened. I immediately locked myself in my room, my breath still slightly short for I still was sobbing a little.

I only took my jersey off, and without bothering anything else, I shrugged and came to flop on the bed with my messy head. Moreover the hunger lying in my stomach did a stomachache in me, yet I had no appetite.

"Akashi-kun… I really was hoping that I could still have a ramen lunch together with you."

I mumbled myself, as I recalled of what I had said back then in my parallel dimension trick; not sure what it exactly was, I decided to keep it as something private. After all, I assumed that no one has any need to know about Akashi-kun's hourglass-limited confession.

Rolling around a few more seconds, still I didn't plan on doing anything else but mourn. Soon I came to conclude that it should be fine to mourn for the night, doing nothing but think of Akashi-kun.

"I was wishing that one day I'll meet up with you again."

And I truly wanted to thank him for everything he had done once more, and perhaps, explain of the vague feeling I've come to discover after Murasakibara-kun's words.

"I wish I still had a chance to say 'I love you'; for I've only realized it today. This… indescribable and unconditional love."

Knowing it was no longer possible; still I imagined what if everything had happened sooner.

_Would the kiss earlier be longer? Would the touch lay soften on my skins?_

That moment of confession, though, I was certain, that I do like Kagami-kun, and liked Aomine-kun, yet somehow, I came to love Akashi-kun; it took me a while to realize that I've always only liked Kagami-kun and not love him. To differ the word 'love' and 'like'… I didn't know it'd have to go through such events.

As I gazed at nowhere, and heard a small chatter of the TV from the living room. I was sure, it was reporting news saying that a Japanese tycoon's son had passed away—Rakuzan High School Basketball Club's captain, Akashi Seijuurou.

"Do you know that this world is missing you now…?"

Though soon I realized, that the more I think about it and the more I repeat it in my seamless minds, my regrets would be endless and meaningless.

I clenched my fingers onto the thin blanket on my bed, and buried my face on my bed.

"I'll carry on…"

An image of Kagami-kun showed up in my mind. I could imagine another set of happy days without agony and miseries, just like my usual days at Seirin. It was surely an image of a life I've always longed for. Yet, I wasn't sure if I'd include the word 'love' in my image.

"…But even though I carry on,"

A faded red-tinted shadow, though, showed up in my hazy imagination.

"My love for you is far from gone…"

.

.

* * *

**~Afterwords~**

Kanpai! Cheers! *bows*

Just another random writing from me—inspired by a song by NOISIA titled "My World (ft. Giovanca)", and inspired by the loss of my dearest Akashi-printed badge… It's just a badge, but still, I care for it a lot because of a precious value aside the price. *p*

Sorry for the lame title, though. I just don't have any other idea. *sobs* I'm sorry for always picking on Akashi and Kuroko though… They sure work hard in every of my fics. *cough*

As always, thank you for bearing with my super-long and super-weird stories; this is the longest yet / And I'm sorry that I'm not into making chaptered fics—I hope dividing them into ten parts helped to make reading slightly easier! ;;

I appreciate every comments—I hope to improve more as time goes by, to pour all my random ideas even in a more enjoyable way~! (Especially that I need to learn how to write first-person fics better)

**~Thanks~**

To Revixtion-kun and Ann, for the relentless support and accompanying me through writing all these and helping me get out of my shameless vocabulary block.

To NOISIA, for inspiring me with their great songs!

To Tadatoshi Fujimaki, for creating this awesome series!

And, to everyone who have read this!

I hope to see you again soon!


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